National Pastime!!!

Nope....I am not talking about America-bashing or War-mongering or Stock market-tracking....

You might not be able to relate to what I say if you aren’t 20-something-single, especially in India, let me rephrase-if you 'weren’t' 20-something-single in India ever. Any public gathering you go to or don’t go to, the questions are raised; all people can think about asking you over the phone is this; all they ask your parents, relatives, friends is this. The protagonists are usually the old uncles and aunts whom you never knew existed on your family tree. But even the just-married-younger cousins can start probing; don’t be fooled by their preoccupation with the 'honeymoon'. I call it the "National-Pastime" (please don’t sue me if you or someone you know, already named it so / or has an objection in me naming it so)

OK, OK, before you lose interest let me state what the pastime is....'Match-making' and 'Talking marriage'...the question comes with quiet a few variations....

          "Are u still single?" (read "Are you out of your mind?")

          "Are your parents looking for a boy for you?" (read "Are they being responsible in life?")   

          "How can you be unmarried at 26?"  (read "Sacrilege!!!Sacrilege!!!)

          "Did you see that boy wearing the white kurta? What do u think?"  (Yes, decide your life partner at one glance at a wedding)     

They are satisfied if you say "I am looking but not finding". But if you make the mistake of saying what my blabber mouth usually does: "not right now", you had it. Then follows the plethora of advice ranging from: "you need a companion" to "The ticking biological clock". 

After many a slip from my end I learnt my lesson. All those people have made a good story-teller (self-proclaimed) out of me. I myself am surprised with things I can come up with on a moments notice and stand my ground for a while. One of them is about 'ACP Rathore' who is posted in rural Jharkhand and we are looking at a wedding as soon as he gets leave, steering the talk to regional imbalance or BIMARU states. 

The other fib being 'Abhimanyu', who is working for an infrastructure company and is on an assignment to Uganda right now. You ask why Uganda of all places....well, I have way too many relatives/friends in the US and Europe who will jump at the first opportunity to say they would like to meet him. So,Uganda is safe and its not unimaginable with India's Look-Africa policy. Also, it steers the topic to "International Affairs" far away from my "Domestic Affairs".

Everybody married wants everybody else to be married. Fiendish!! "I am suffering after marriage, how could you be happy staying single". I call it fiendish only because I see them constantly having their brawls with their "better" halves. Wow, what a way to shove the "marriage" card down my throat. 

While I was growing up I thought people went to weddings to wear nice clothes and jewellery. Then I grew up a little more and thought its an occasion to meet others, socialise. Now I think they come only to gossip and find out who is single-ready-to-be-noosed. People do you realise you are scarring me for life here!!!

I hope none of my 'well-wishing relatives' are reading this post. If you are then this is just a blog where I lie for lack of topics to write about.

(image source : blog.nextnewnetworks.com/2007/08/)